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Sharknado 3: Oh Hell No! - Rating: * * * (Reviewed by Louis Stephenson) *SPOILERS*

1/24/2016

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***CONTAINS SPOILERS***


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THE STORY:
The shark infested tornados spiral further out of control, culminating in one final super-storm that could destroy the entire East Coast of the United States.  Joined by the likes of the Hoff and Frankie “Malcolm” Muniz, it’s Fin Shephard to the rescue for a third time.
 
Oh Hell No!...  was certainly my reaction to the announcement that this second silly sequel had gone into production.  That said, there comes a certain indestructability with such an unashamedly schlocky franchise that is designed to be exactly that.  So I can either spend the next 200 or so words taking cheap shots at cheap gags like some out of touch asshole, or I can just get the joke… more or less.
 
Packed end to end with countless cameos of non-actors, most of which are unrecognisable to a UK audience, and Tara Reid…it doesn’t take much for lead, Ian Ziering’s unremarkable performance to shine through.  In particular, I found the scene in which Fin becomes stuck in a theme park ride that subsequently plummets and shit-whips him into another attraction funny as fuck.  The fact it was intentionally funny caught me by surprise.
 
And after the halfway point, the ridiculous spectacle, the corny action-movie quotes settle in to your icy cynicism like a hot cup of tea.  That could just be the snow outside getting to me…  Anyways!  The proceedings take a real dive at the hour mark.  The lull coincides with the appearance of Fin’s father, Hasselhoff (who else?!).  It’s not his fault, but his presence doesn’t do much to distract us from the overly long, and ironically boring build-up to their rocket launch.
 
I won’t mention what happens between Fin’s pregnant wife, April and a shark turned space pirate, but up until that moment she may as well have not been in the movie at all.
 
LAST WORDS:
There’s still some funny left in this ludicrous film series.  And with that I cast my vote to Sharknado 3’s underwhelming cliff-hanger.  #AprilDies  #IHopeSharknado4IsCalledTheLastOne
 
 

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