THE STORY:
If you’ve seen a horror movie with his name in the title, then you already pretty much know what the deal is. It’s Christmas time once again and here comes Krampus to kill us all…
Before the fun even begins – and it starts early – Krampus Unleashed doesn’t make it easy for you to like it. Firstly, you have its name, which automatically associates it with what is bound to become an endless array of horrifically bad rip-offs of the Michael Dougherty picture. No, he wasn’t the first, but he remains the best. Secondly, its trailer gives away everything with horrific sound editing to boot. Something that I can attest has mostly been cleaned up for its DVD release here in the UK.
So what does this Unleashed have going for it? Well for starters Krampus himself may give you the sweet pang of nostalgia as he looks a lot like Jim Carrey’s The Grinch… if The Grinch had decided to roll around in his own shit! I’m just assuming it isn’t green…
You may also have been sucked in by this year’s box office horror hits, such as your Annabelles and your Its, and even the return of Jigsaw. And why not? Like horror is suffering from too much support these days! But if that be the case, this little flick just might be that delightful reminder of why you love your good old-fashioned So-Bad-It’s-Good independent blood fests.
And it certainly comes thick and fast! Limbs! Guts! They’re all up for grabs! Krampus may walk like a man, but he is a wild animal in this festive creature feature. Unfortunately the editing tries to make one or two of the kills seem slick’n’quick, but if you’re not really paying attention they just come across more like blink or you’ll miss it. But if you like your body count high you won’t be too disappointed because there is plenty for the beast to chomp on as it is just that kind of movie!
The acting can seem a little wooden at times, and yet this turns out to be almost believable as the rate at which these characters are bumped off is so ridiculous that it’s impossible for someone to process that many deaths at once. This ultimately makes the moments that anyone has the chance to have that dramatic emotional breakdown seem instantly laughable.
In similar confounding fashion, this also swings the other way. As the final act breathes its bloodied breath on the backs of our young survivors, they sit in the home of an old man conspiring to defeat Krampus once and for all like all their loved ones are waiting for them at home. And some of them are. In pieces! It’s like watching that scene from a kid’s show where they plot excitedly to win the big game or outsmart the nasty bullies. “Everyone you love has just been horribly mutilated, you morons! What the fuck is wrong with you?!” Your mind may scream.
And I do have to slap a big-ass What The Fuck on that ending. As in, what the fuck is with that baby??? Are we supposed to assume that this Krampus is actually female?
LAST WORDS:
If you can see your way through the fog of this picture’s shortcomings, you just might have a little fun. There’s plenty of gore to last you through Christmas and New Year. You might even let out a little titter at the open credits’ rendition of ‘Let It Snow’. The backing music is sound enough but that lead vocalist cannot sing for shit!
If you’ve seen a horror movie with his name in the title, then you already pretty much know what the deal is. It’s Christmas time once again and here comes Krampus to kill us all…
Before the fun even begins – and it starts early – Krampus Unleashed doesn’t make it easy for you to like it. Firstly, you have its name, which automatically associates it with what is bound to become an endless array of horrifically bad rip-offs of the Michael Dougherty picture. No, he wasn’t the first, but he remains the best. Secondly, its trailer gives away everything with horrific sound editing to boot. Something that I can attest has mostly been cleaned up for its DVD release here in the UK.
So what does this Unleashed have going for it? Well for starters Krampus himself may give you the sweet pang of nostalgia as he looks a lot like Jim Carrey’s The Grinch… if The Grinch had decided to roll around in his own shit! I’m just assuming it isn’t green…
You may also have been sucked in by this year’s box office horror hits, such as your Annabelles and your Its, and even the return of Jigsaw. And why not? Like horror is suffering from too much support these days! But if that be the case, this little flick just might be that delightful reminder of why you love your good old-fashioned So-Bad-It’s-Good independent blood fests.
And it certainly comes thick and fast! Limbs! Guts! They’re all up for grabs! Krampus may walk like a man, but he is a wild animal in this festive creature feature. Unfortunately the editing tries to make one or two of the kills seem slick’n’quick, but if you’re not really paying attention they just come across more like blink or you’ll miss it. But if you like your body count high you won’t be too disappointed because there is plenty for the beast to chomp on as it is just that kind of movie!
The acting can seem a little wooden at times, and yet this turns out to be almost believable as the rate at which these characters are bumped off is so ridiculous that it’s impossible for someone to process that many deaths at once. This ultimately makes the moments that anyone has the chance to have that dramatic emotional breakdown seem instantly laughable.
In similar confounding fashion, this also swings the other way. As the final act breathes its bloodied breath on the backs of our young survivors, they sit in the home of an old man conspiring to defeat Krampus once and for all like all their loved ones are waiting for them at home. And some of them are. In pieces! It’s like watching that scene from a kid’s show where they plot excitedly to win the big game or outsmart the nasty bullies. “Everyone you love has just been horribly mutilated, you morons! What the fuck is wrong with you?!” Your mind may scream.
And I do have to slap a big-ass What The Fuck on that ending. As in, what the fuck is with that baby??? Are we supposed to assume that this Krampus is actually female?
LAST WORDS:
If you can see your way through the fog of this picture’s shortcomings, you just might have a little fun. There’s plenty of gore to last you through Christmas and New Year. You might even let out a little titter at the open credits’ rendition of ‘Let It Snow’. The backing music is sound enough but that lead vocalist cannot sing for shit!
RSS Feed
