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THE HOUSE ON SORORITY ROW (1983) - Rating: * * (Reviewed by Louis Stephenson)

12/27/2017

THE STORY:
Sick and tired of Mrs Slater’s tyrannical reign as their Housemother, seven sorority sisters devise a prank to get revenge. After an accident results in her death on the Eve of their graduation, they band together to cover it up. But as a night of celebration wears on, the seven sisters start disappearing one by one. Someone knows their secret. But who…? Blu-ray No.31 in 88 Films Slasher Classics Collection.

First known to us as House of Evil when it reached our shores in 1983, the slasher classic also known as The House on Sorority Row had actually been cut for our viewing audiences. All I can say is my case of modern-day desensitization must be worse than I thought because if the version we have today actually passes for ‘uncut’, then damn, they must’ve thought they were watching a frickin’ comedy back then! Yeah, the bird’s eye shot of the toilet is pretty nasty, but aside from that…how is this even still worthy of its 18 certificate?

When you know little factoids such as one of the seven sisters being killed off early because her hairstyle was too alike to another sister, it only cements opinion that not a lot of effort was put into creating a distinguishable character for each girl. So what we are left with is a very basic, flaccid slasher film, lacking the savagery and invention of its more successful competitors. That is, until we reach the final act.

Astoundingly, The House on Sorority Row does what so, so very few slasher movies do. It steps up its game in Act 3, and then some. Friday the 13th (1980) and A Nightmare on Elm Street (1984) will always be wonderful editions in slasher history, but by comparison Friday’s final shout turns into a bunch of annoyingly continuous running and hiding, whilst Nightmare’s showdown comes off as a funnier version of Mouse Trap. Their saving grace is that both their twist endings are better than Row’s.

LAST WORDS:
Watch out for sister Katherine’s drug-induced psychedelic trip out scene. It’s most likely a sure-fire unpopular opinion, but I’m just going to say it: The remake is better. R.I.P Carrie & Debbie.

EXTRAS:
If you’re a slipcase collector, I’ve just checked the website and I have some bad news… They are still in stock. There was a vote on this one and oh, dear god, the result totally sucks ass. You also get a booklet. I don’t know about you, but I don’t fucking read them. Primarily because I fall asleep mere seconds into trying to get through my own reading list, so I stand no chance when squinting at any accomplished horror connoisseur’s scribings. The actual Special Features consist of interviews with the film’s composer and critic Kim Newman, and an Audio Commentary done via podcast… Podcast? Whatever melts your better, I guess…

The Toolbox Murders (1978) - Rating: * * 1/2 (Reviewed by Louis Stephenson)

12/27/2017

THE STORY:
An apartment block is terrorised by a masked killer with a penchant for using handy implements to murder his young female victims. Until one goes missing… Blu-ray No.30 in 88 Films Slasher Classics Collection.

The most interesting thing about this movie is that to some extent it’s like Psycho (1960), but in reverse. It starts out with this gruesome string of murders, but the entire tone of the movie changes when he kidnaps and keeps his final victim and the killing stops. The identity of our killer is suddenly revealed to us as we get to see into his world.

It is here that we learn his tragic backstory; the motivation behind all the murders. And despite the cruel nature in which he dispatches the girls, his broken-hearted demeanor somehow manages to inspire great sympathy for his character.

This formula, while different, doesn’t always work, as is evident by the original When A Stranger Calls (1979), which begins with its iconic terrifying opening sequence but then descends into one peculiar and depressing hour of the killer trying helplessly to re-enter society. Fortunately this is where Toolbox succeeds.

The depiction of the female victims when under attack is extremely frustrating and frankly quite insulting. They’re not very smart. They don’t move fast at all. And they are all considerably weak. It’s an unfavourable comparison but for the most part they really do act like cattle waiting for the slaughter. You can probably guess from all that just how horrid the acting is here.

It’s easy to pull out the ‘sexist’ label here, but in similar fashion there is also a male character who does little to nothing to stop his supposed buddy from continuously throwing lit matches at his accelerant-soaked clothes. And I’m pretty sure that this scene takes place in a room with at least one unlocked door…

All that said, if a horror movie like this was released in cinemas today, with our increasingly vocal society, popcorn and soda would be raining down on the front row like a goddamn monsoon.

LAST WORDS:
If you can forgive some appalling performances, there is still the violence that follows. The second half of the movie has many redeeming qualities. Some favour The Funhouse (1981) director Tobe Hooper’s 2004 remake, but I find this original to be more intriguing.

EXTRAS:
Collectors will be happy to know that for now anyways, the slipcase edition is still available on 88 Film’s website. And much like their Intruder release, the design is the same as the chosen cover art. The Special Features on this one is packed with interviews, Audio Commentary, the usual booklet and reversible cover. But most notably we have Toolbox uncut here in the UK for the first time, and in 4K Transfer to boot!

Cult of Chucky - Rating * * 1/2 (Reviewed by Louis Stephenson)

12/27/2017

THE STORY:
After the events of 2013’s Curse of Chucky, Nica – played by Fiona Dourif – finds herself institutionalized, framed for the murder of her entire family. Having been convinced by the sinister Dr. Foley that Chucky isn’t real she is soon transferred to a minimum security facility. Unfortunately for Nica, it isn’t long before she starts to suspect that Chucky really does exist and is back for more bloodshed.

I held out for a high hope that this could actually be an intelligent film. And while Chucky’s latest master-plan may outwit your run-of-the-mill stoner, ultimately it runs like a bitch from its potential and just ends up being boring and unremarkable at times. There’s no tension. Just bullshit. Enjoyable bullshit, of course! But bullshit just the same…

Thankfully Cult retains some of the doll designs from the previous film, so Chucky still has his renewed creepy look here. Following on from Curse he continues to blossom as an increasingly crafty villain. One other factor that I cannot deny in favour of this 7th film is that it finally decides to break its own rules and blow the barn doors off their hinges. Forget what you think you know about a Child’s Play movie. This Chucky may not have gotten darker, but he sure as shit got smarter!

While Fiona is a sympathetic and reliable acting talent, let’s not pretend that this latest edition to the Child’s Play franchise isn’t a step and a half down from the comeback glory of its predecessor, so in turn it asks much less of its players as a result.

The members of Nica’s little patient circle are likeable enough, but most of the time their characters feel watered down. This isn’t surprising due to mental illness being one of the year’s hot topics and the fact that our culture continues to mutate into a completely non-existent Utopia of political correctness. Don’t get me wrong, I was hardly expecting Girl, Interrupted (1999). But there was a time when an 18 certificate actually gave you a little freedom.

LAST WORDS:
Despite finally stepping things up in terms of its own universe, as well as having a truly awesome death scene, I never felt content that his movie would not degrade itself back to the days of Seed of Chucky (2004). It’s by no means perfect. The makeup of a movie like Cult threatens to be complicated if mishandled, and Chucky just doesn’t do complicated.

But luckily, what I saw was that Cult of Chucky is simply Child’s Play 2 (1990) to Curse of Chucky’s original Child’s Play (1988). Just the next installment in the story, except amped up with a little bit of the kookiness found in Bride of Chucky (1998), which ain’t so bad after all.

Red Christmas - Rating: * * * 1/2 (Reviewed by Louis Stephenson)

12/24/2017

THE STORY:
A son by the name of Cletus (Sam Campbell) who survived his own abortion wreaks a vicious and bloody revenge on his mother, Diane – played by Dee Wallace – and her bickering family who have gathered to celebrate their last Christmas in the family home before it is sold off.

The best thing about movies like Red Christmas is that just like 101 Films’ last seasonal slasher release All Through The House (2015) almost a year prior – just shy of a week, actually – its violence relies heavily on practical gore! Which is just as well as each of their respective plots is just as ridiculous as the other, and so the blood and guts fly in their chunks and torrents. The effects team has done a spectacular job here. And I rarely get to type that anymore thanks to the unnecessary integration of shitty, shitty CGI in recent years.

I’ve always been fond of Dee Wallace and what work of hers that I have seen. But for whatever the reasons may be, perhaps plot or character development or just plain sexism in Hollywood when it comes to female roles, her characters have always been partially passive and ineffectual, reacting to this and that. So it’s nice to see her completely losing her shit and getting her hands dirty here. I honestly don’t think I’ve ever heard her drop the F bomb so much. Damn, woman!

Whatever thought processes Sam Campbell put into his portrayal as Diane’s deformed killer son, Cletus, the result does pay homage to John Hurt’s performance as John Merrick in The Elephant Man (1980). It’s a pretty neat reference point, and it would also explain why he chose to speak with the voice of a man that is four to five times his age.

The only other cast member worth mentioning is Gerard O’Dwyer , who plays Diane’s other son, Jerry. He has a great presence in the house and the conflict that arises between him and his mother tugs the heartstrings, a rare thing for a slasher movie. Even threatening to tear them all right out.

LAST WORDS:
Even though it raises the issue of abortion, the plot of this movie is too silly to be preachy, so enjoy Red Christmas for what it is. Speaking of which, be sure to keep your eyes peeled for at least 2 excellent death scenes here, one involving a bear trap and the other a blender. The execution of the latter is quite wonderful.

Black Christmas - Rating: * * * * (Reviewed by Louis Stephenson)

12/24/2017

INTRO:
On your travels through the backless dark closet that is the world of classic horror movies you may have heard that John Carpenter’s 1978 classic, Halloween was the first definitive seasonal slasher film. I don’t know card games, but I know a little something about horror and I call ‘Bullshit!’ Fucking bullshit, in fact!

Released four years prior, even said to have influenced Carpenter himself in the making of Halloween, this bitch right here, Black Christmas is the motherfucking pioneer of pioneers. Its unnerving phone call sequences and terrifying climax even inspired the genre-rejuvenating Scream franchise directed by the late and oh so great Wes Craven.
So now that we’ve got that shit straight, let’s get this fucker started.

THE STORY:
A sorority house receives obscene and frightening phone calls from an unknown assailant. Dismissing them as empty threats, the sisters are soon proven wrong as the macabre events of the following day unfold.

Acting props have to be given to Marian Waldman who is hilarious as Mrs. Mac, the foul-mouthed Housemother, and of course, Margot Kidder as the colourful, racy, boozy character of sister Barb. I’m fond of Kidder so I hate to say it that she just looks – and sounds – too old to be a sorority sister. The fact that she has to appear drunk with a little messy make-up doesn’t help matters either.

Thankfully the beautiful Olivia Hussey gives a much stronger performance here than her turn in perhaps her more recognisable role as Audra in the Tommy Lee Wallace directed TV mini-series adaption of Stephen King’s IT (1990). She plays the perfect pitch of fear and dread for an especially spine-tingling finale.

Here we also find good old reliable John Saxon as our trusty police presence a decade before his part as Nancy’s lieutenant father in the aforementioned Wes Craven’s 1984 classic, A Nightmare on Elm Street. He never quite catches Billy or Freddy, but at least he tries!

What makes the villain of this movie so damn creepy is that despite being hidden by neither black giallo gloves, a rubber William Shatner mask nor a tipped fedora, he remains completely unseen by us as viewers. Appearing as a pair of clawed bare hands, or a glaring maniacal eye shrouded in heavy shadow, we also see through his eyes as we witness the unstable monster that he truly is as he screams, rips, smashes and destroys everything that crosses his path.

Ironically there is something comforting and predictable about a masked night-stalker with a knife – a plan of survival may fall into place at some point – as opposed to running into this unpredictable creature that will tear you to shreds like a wild animal as soon as he lays his maddened eyes on you.

LAST WORDS:
I’ll admit I had to compare both DVD and Blu-ray versions just to make sure 101 Films wasn’t pulling my leg. And I was wrong, there really is a difference. But I swear, sometimes it feels like there are some bastards out there that just want to make a quick buck by ripping off a DVD with a decent quality picture.

Regardless, what amazes me most about this picture is that even after being late to the party – having seen the Scream movies, your Urban Legends, the fun yet loose remake, titled as Black Xmas, and both versions of When A Strange Calls – which I maintain are both creepy as fuck in their own right – the climax to this movie still freaks the absolute fuck out of me and keeps me looking over my shoulder at night. There are many situations that I never want to find myself in, but amongst the Top 5 of those would be to hear the words “Agnes, it’s me Billy” whispered from behind me…

EXTRAS:
I’m unaware as to why they couldn’t get this release together for a 40th Anniversary, Suspiria (1977) style, but there was at least a Black Christmas reunion panel held at the 2014 Fan Expo in Canada to celebrate such an occasion, footage of which is just one of a handful of Special Features that 101 Films has provided for us. This panel comes complete with two accompanying documentaries, a full-sized movie poster, a reversible cover in the vein of Arrow and 88 Films, and more.

SUSPIRIA (40TH ANNIVERSARY) - Rating: * * * * * (Reviewed by Louis Stephenson)

12/21/2017

INTRO:
It’s been hailed as one of “the greatest horror movie(s) of all time”, and this dual format 4K restoration release of Italian director, Dario Argento’s signature classic has come to pass on nothing less than its 40th Anniversary. So if you don’t know the story by now, 2 things. No.1: Shame on thee! And No.2: I am actually just a little bit frickin’ jealous that this will be your first encounter with such a glorious gem!

STORY:
Okay, so one time now for all you lucky virgins out there, Suspiria tells the tale of a dance academy in Germany that holds the darkest of secrets. And with new arrival, Suzy, a student from America, whatever evil that lurks in the shadowy halls emerges to destroy anything and anyone that gets in its way.

Before Suzy even steps onto legitimate German soil we are greeted with the picture’s hair-raising soundtrack composed by Goblin, Argento’s previous collaborators on the1975 giallo, Deep Red. Its surreal tinkering percussion is both nightmarish and dream-like at the same time. Here it is given to us as clear as church bells, iconic and a true musical masterpiece in its own merit.

The restoration itself is a thing of undeniable beauty when combined with the ever-present colour scheme of the picture’s atmospheric lighting and stunning set pieces. All these wonderful elements are probably most noticeable in the moments leading up to the demise of Suspiria’s first victim, one of horror’s supreme death scenes. Goblin reach their zentih with a frightening chorus under-scored by some punchy Rock’n’Roll guitar. Details once hidden come to light, transforming and elevating the entire experience to newer and seldom travelled realms of horror and fear.

The haunting climax of this scene, however, has changed drastically from Cult Films’ previous 2012 Cinema Classics version . The once vibrant colours have been muted, presumably to alter the shade of our victim’s streaming blood from appearing like spilt nail varnish to a more realistic red. Although I understand the reasoning behind the correction, I still find myself somehow missing the unexpected magic quality that came before.

LAST WORDS:
As the movie creeps and crawls onwards to its chilling end, the new lease on life that this restoration has bestowed upon it continues to dig further under my skin as every spooky sequence ascends to newfound trepidation. Watching, I await each one with a delicious sense of wonderment and terror.

EXTRAS:
New features on this restoration release include an introduction by director Dario Argento himself; an interview with Argento to commemorate his picture’s 40th Anniversary, as well as a look into what goes into a 4K restoration. Meanwhile it maintains all of the features from the 2012 version, which include the Fear at 400 Degrees documentary and Suspiria Perspectives by Cine Excess. And last but not least, the Audio Commentary by Alan Jones and Kim Newman.

Krampus Unleashed - Rating: * * (Reviewed by Louis Stephenson)

12/21/2017

THE STORY:
If you’ve seen a horror movie with his name in the title, then you already pretty much know what the deal is. It’s Christmas time once again and here comes Krampus to kill us all…

Before the fun even begins – and it starts early – Krampus Unleashed doesn’t make it easy for you to like it. Firstly, you have its name, which automatically associates it with what is bound to become an endless array of horrifically bad rip-offs of the Michael Dougherty picture. No, he wasn’t the first, but he remains the best. Secondly, its trailer gives away everything with horrific sound editing to boot. Something that I can attest has mostly been cleaned up for its DVD release here in the UK.

So what does this Unleashed have going for it? Well for starters Krampus himself may give you the sweet pang of nostalgia as he looks a lot like Jim Carrey’s The Grinch… if The Grinch had decided to roll around in his own shit! I’m just assuming it isn’t green…

You may also have been sucked in by this year’s box office horror hits, such as your Annabelles and your Its, and even the return of Jigsaw. And why not? Like horror is suffering from too much support these days! But if that be the case, this little flick just might be that delightful reminder of why you love your good old-fashioned So-Bad-It’s-Good independent blood fests.

And it certainly comes thick and fast! Limbs! Guts! They’re all up for grabs! Krampus may walk like a man, but he is a wild animal in this festive creature feature. Unfortunately the editing tries to make one or two of the kills seem slick’n’quick, but if you’re not really paying attention they just come across more like blink or you’ll miss it. But if you like your body count high you won’t be too disappointed because there is plenty for the beast to chomp on as it is just that kind of movie!

The acting can seem a little wooden at times, and yet this turns out to be almost believable as the rate at which these characters are bumped off is so ridiculous that it’s impossible for someone to process that many deaths at once. This ultimately makes the moments that anyone has the chance to have that dramatic emotional breakdown seem instantly laughable.

In similar confounding fashion, this also swings the other way. As the final act breathes its bloodied breath on the backs of our young survivors, they sit in the home of an old man conspiring to defeat Krampus once and for all like all their loved ones are waiting for them at home. And some of them are. In pieces! It’s like watching that scene from a kid’s show where they plot excitedly to win the big game or outsmart the nasty bullies. “Everyone you love has just been horribly mutilated, you morons! What the fuck is wrong with you?!” Your mind may scream.

And I do have to slap a big-ass What The Fuck on that ending. As in, what the fuck is with that baby??? Are we supposed to assume that this Krampus is actually female?

LAST WORDS:
If you can see your way through the fog of this picture’s shortcomings, you just might have a little fun. There’s plenty of gore to last you through Christmas and New Year. You might even let out a little titter at the open credits’ rendition of ‘Let It Snow’. The backing music is sound enough but that lead vocalist cannot sing for shit!

Apocalypse Road - Rating: * * * 1/2 (Reviewed by Chloe Davies)

12/20/2017

‘Apocalypse Road’ is a thriller set in a future where most people are kept prisoner in camps, but the story revolves around two sisters who have managed to evade this fate and while searching for supplies and ways to survive, become separated. The film follows their two journeys as they desperately try to survive and find each other again.

Although I would have liked some more explanation in terms of how the world of the film came to be the way it was, it has to be understood that the film clearly intends to be about more than post-apocalyptic action and is more about the relationship between Natalie and Sarah. Their relationship isn’t painted as perfect and isn’t idealised – they argue, and it makes them believable characters. Their bond is still special and provides good motivation for them to stay alive even when there’s no hope left, and also shows the ugly side of them (Natalie in particular) as they do what is necessary to find each other. By the end, their desperation to find each other again becomes even more clear and more intense. This is all made even better by the great acting talent involved with the film, which I wasn’t expecting when I started watching the film.

The locations are also incredible, especially for an independent film of this genre. Finding good, quiet places for a film where there aren’t many people around must have been difficult, but it paid off. The only main problem I had overall was the bounty hunter character, who didn’t really have much of a character at all. It was difficult to figure out what his deal was and was a bit too mysterious to the point of him just existing to provide an antagonist.

Overall, I really enjoyed this film. It felt unique despite the post-apocalyptic genre being done so much, and the protagonists were easy to connect with and interesting. The ending also wraps things up nicely, I just would have liked a bit more explanation in relation to how the world became the way it did; however, this ultimately isn’t the focus of the film and is more about the characters, which is something that should be celebrated about it.

The Gatehouse - Rating: * * 1/2 (Reviewed by Chloe Davies)

12/20/2017

‘The Gatehouse is a horror/fantasy/comedy about 10-year-old Eternity (Scarlett Rayner) who spends her time digging for treasure in the ancient forest that surrounds her house, but eventually digs up something that the forest wants to take back. A complaint many people seem to have about this film is that the tone is a bit all over the place, and I have to agree; it starts out giving the impression that it’s going to be about a haunting or a psychological horror as it shows the nightmares of Eternity’s father, Jack (Simeon Willis), as well as including fantasy and mythological elements. On top of that, it also makes an attempt at humour.

Some of the humour in particular is what feels most out of place as it seems to contradict the type of characters that were established in the beginning of the film. For example, Eternity and Jack are shown to have a sweet, charming relationship in the opening scenes, and we’re given the impression that Eternity is an unusual but well-meaning child, yet later on becomes really rude and annoying to the point where I found it difficult to sympathise with her any more. In fact, it made me a little more sympathetic towards Jack for having to put up with her, and I don’t think that’s the reaction the film was trying to go for.

There are some nice shots in the film and the setting is beautiful. The gatehouse and the forest certainly have a character of their own – it’s great to see a low budget film manage to find the perfect location, and it does help to put emphasis on the mystic and magical elements of the film. Overall, I wouldn’t actively recommend this film because it doesn’t seem to know what it wants to be and could’ve done with better performances (some of the delivery felt a little off at times) and the ending was too cheesy for me, but it’s easy viewing and a quick watch. It does at least to have something to say with Eternity and Jack’s relationship even if it is inconsistent, and that’s easily the best thing about it.