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I want to be a Monster when I grow up by M.T. Weber - Rating: * * * * * (Reviewed by Nathan Robinson)

11/28/2016

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Horror for young kids is woefully under represented nowadays. Kids love dark stories, parents might not like that, but my two squeal with glee when I tell them a story in which kids are threatened by something wanting to eat them (sometimes, they do get eaten when authors are brave enough to touch on that taboo), although they are just as happy with a story about a teddy bear going on a magical adventure. Kids generally like anything parents put in front of them (except broccoli), so telling kids scary stories is a good way to introduce them to more adult themes.
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“I want to be a Monster when I grow up” is a perfect little book to take your little ones out of their safe zone and bring out the bogey men whilst maintaining the mirth and not scaring the kiddies too much, all whilst delivery positive messages about eating your greens, going to bed and being nice to your family. The book is Americanised, though changing Mom for Mum is no great feat, and I even changed the name of the main character to that of my son to make it more likeable and involving story.

The familiar monsters that plague the pages are competently illustrated and there’s just enough detail to make them scary, but not threatening. If you fancy a tale that’s little out of the norm for children, but still maintaining a positive message throughout, you won’t go wrong with this for your little terrors.
 
5/5

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Aliens Omnibus Volume 2: Genocide by David Bischoff /Alien Harvest by Robert Sheckley - Overall Rating: * * * * (Reviewed by Nathan Robinson)

11/12/2016

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GENOCIDE by David Bischoff The alien queen is dead, the hive mind left to flounder... and on a world bereft of its leader two strains of Alien divide their forces for world-shattering, acid-drenched war. On Earth, in the wake of alien infestation, athletes are flocking to humanity s Goodwill Games. But some come with a deadly new tool: a drug called Fire, distilled from the very essence of the Aliens body chemistry. The military wants it. Pharmaceutical kingpin Daniel Grant wants it. But the only place the essential ingredient can be found is on that terrible world, convulsed by Alien holocaust. ALIEN HARVEST by Robert Sheckley Royal jelly, the most illicit of Alien by-products, is keeping Dr Stan Myakovsky alive. A once-famous scientist fallen on hard times, Stan is fighting off the repo-men and trying hard to patent the cybernetic ant that will reinstate his reputation. Julie Lish is beautiful, mysterious, and totally amoral. She has a plan so outrageous that there might be one chance in a million to pull it off. Together they make an attempt to grab the ultimate treasure royal jelly from an Alien hive.
 
Right, I’ll confess, I’ve not read volume 1, although now I wish I had. Aliens invading Earth. Tick! I love the Alien franchise (well, most of it) and I’ve read a few of the Dark Horse comics, which filled the gaps between the films.
 
So Volume 2 kicks off, the Aliens have infested earth, but the battle still rages and the troops are winning, pushing the aliens back and grinding their numbers down. Both novels follow a similar timeline and even similar plotlines, which detracts from the binding of these stories together. It’s like they gave two writers the same outline involving a trip to an alien planet in order to steal “Royal Jelly” a substance created by Alien Queens, which also happens to have fantastic medical properties, quickly becoming the most sought after substance in the galaxy.
 
“Genocide” involves a troop of marines led by the beautiful, though battle weary Colonel Kozlowski, who leads her men (and women), along with a team of scientists and billionaire pharmaceutical kingpin Daniel Grant, onto an Alien hive world in order to pilfer some of that lovely, pure royal jelly. Naturally, things go tits up, as they always do in the Alien universe and people die in the traditional fashion. It all feels familiar, ticking off the tropes that made Aliens such a great film (and novel, I adored the Alan Dean Foster novelisation’s of the original trilogy.) Fans of Aliens will lap this up, wanting more. I’ve previously enjoyed the novelisation of “The Blob” by David Bischoff, and he captures the gore well. He knows how to pull people apart.
 
“Alien Harvest” again involves a trip to distant planet in order to pilfer some lovely “Royal Jelly” (sound familiar?) although this time it’s a dying scientist, a female thief, a couple of robots and a motley crew of convicts after some time off their sentence.
 
“Alien Harvest” starts out strong, setting itself out as a one last heist for some truly desperate characters. I almost forgot about the impending aliens for moment as the book became more about the characters than stereotypes being chewed up by shadows from the scenery.
Then the aliens do come. And people start doing weird shit that they full well know will get them killed. The last fifth of the book loses it steam a little. Things happen, but for no reason. I was loving the story up until this point, but as the action gets going I cared less and less for the characters did stupider and stupider things.
There is a cool thing, which I thought was woefully underused. Along for the ride is a brilliantly written Android named Gill who remains murderously devoted to his employer, but there’s also a robotic alien called Norbert, which sounds ridiculous, but is actually quite a cool idea, but used to full effect, which made me a little bit sad.
 
 
If you’re a fan of Alien series and need tiding over until “Alien: Covenant” (being novelised by Alan Dean Foster, YAY!), then the Aliens Omnibus series might be worth your time despite the similarities between them.
 
Game over man. Game over.
 
Genocide 4/5
Alien Harvest 3.5/5
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